Army unveils new logo that totally doesn’t resemble a butthole
You can't unsee it.
By Clay Beyersdorfer
Washington, D.C. — The U.S. Army revealed a new logo yesterday on social media as part of a larger rebrand.
The new emblem features a bold, modern design sure to impress military enthusiasts and casual observers alike. However, there is one thing that the Army wants to make crystal clear: this logo absolutely does not resemble a butthole.
"We can confirm that our new logo is in no way, shape, or form inspired by any body part," said Major General Tom Proktologus, who oversaw the design process, at a press conference Tuesday. "The star in the center of the logo is meant to represent our nation's proud history, and the overall design is a reflection of the Army's resilience and intestinal fortitude. It is not an anus."
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